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Miss Co Says

IF IT WAS YOU?

Posted on March 7, 2018 at 5:50 PM
The question that is asked all too often is "What would you do if it was you?" Well depending on the situation that question can be hard to answer. It is easy to tell someone what they should do based off what you would do. But until we find ourselves facing the same problem we may not do exactly what we thought we would do. For the most part we know ourselves, we know how we think, how we act and how we deal with everyday life and everything in between but what we don't know is what we would actually do if faced with another person's issue or dilemma. We can be quick to judge another person's situation based upon our own experiences and not see the situation for what it is. I use to be one to say what I never would do and as I grew older and life happened I ended up doing everything I said I would never do. I had someone to ask me just recently the question noted above and I told them what I would do, however, I made it clear that what I stated was based upon the scenario given and not the reality or emotional side of it. We say what we would do but we don't know what we would do until we do it. Emotions are good but sometimes if not properly balanced they can cause us to do or say something we wouldn't normally do. When we give advise based on an emotion that is subject to change, we can say one thing and do another. In other words you can tell someone what they should do but when the same thing happens to you, you do opposite of your own advise. Of course when we are calm, relaxed, thinking clearly and logically it all make sense and we say we would do what is right or what is expected but when we are angry, sad, depressed, miserable etc. these emotions drive us and cause us to sometimes do or say things contrary to our own standards. When we measure other people's problems by our standards of living we are subject to giving them faulty advise. (Stressing) IF IT WAS ME I.....well it's not you, its them. Don't get me wrong, it's nothing wrong with giving advice or voicing your opinion especially when they come to you directly and ask you what to do but remember you are the calm one and they are full of emotions uncertain of what to do, just consider if the roles were reversed, empathize with them, help them bring everything into perspective and let them work through their problem to hopefully find the answer on their own. What works or worked for you may not be the answer for them. Something that is simple and straight forward like how to apply for college, sure that's easy to advise on if you've been through the process but something like a marriage on the brinks due to infidelity and they want to know if they should stay or go, that's more complex. That's a marriage, that's a mortgage, that's a family and if you've never been married or if married but never dealt with infidelity within the marriage or even if you have, your outcome may not be their outcome. Again we must take out the emotion of how we felt when it happened to us or if it happened to us because everybody is different and everybody's situation, regardless of how similar to another, may not end the same. There are so many factors to consider when telling someone what you would do if it was you. It's such a simple question but boy oh boy it comes with great effect based upon what we "think" we would do.

Categories: Epiphany

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